My Thoughts

I believe and you will believe, after you read this blog entry, that I am in a severe dating drought. It has been well over 3+ years since I have dated anyone seriously. Yes that is right more than 3 years and at first I was ok with the drought but now it is more than 3 years and I am at the point of enough is enough. I think I am a cool chick. I like sports, especially basketball and football; I mostly root for and watch the home teams. I drink a beer occasionally, Corona with 2 limes please. I think I have a good pretty sense of humor, I am in tuned to politics and money, Suze Orman and Dave Ramsey are my teachers. I don’t give nor do I like drama, life is way too short for all that. I don’t require a whole of time, I like my space. I have a good job, my own house, my own car and no kids. I think I am decent looking, I aint no Willmina Foo-Foo, I aint no Halley Barry either. I could stand to loose some weight , I aint obese(300+ lbs), but who couldn’t stand to drop a few pounds. So why I ask am I in this dating drought?

I have a few theories as to why I am in this drought, one of which is that I don’t go out much. I am not talking about to clubs; I am talking about the events like: Plays, Sporting Events, and just general Social Gatherings. The reason for this is that most of friends are single parents or married and don’t have the flexibility that they once had. I am not one to do a lot of things by myself.

I need to consider expanding my social circles to include folks with the same or similar situation as myself. I will explore this drought issue more in future posts. For now I am signing off.

Patriotism

Main Entry: pa•tri•ot•ism
Pronunciation: \ˈpā-trē-ə-ˌti-zəm, chiefly British ˈpa-\
Function: noun
Date: circa 1726
: Love for or devotion to one’s country.

Lately with the upcoming presidential race I’ve been hearing the word Patriotism a lot. This started me to thinking, ‘what the heck is patriotism?’ Is it running around professing how much you love America at every moment? Is it having an American Flag (which more than likely is made in China) waving outside your home? Is it, in the case of Barak Obama, wearing an American flag lapel pin? Is placing your right hand over your heart when and wherever you hear the American National Anthem being sung? I really don’t know.

As I started to write this blog I thought about what I thought patriotism was and if I was patriotic. While I don’t know if I have a love or devotion for America I can’t really think of another country I would want to live in. I believe the average American isn’t what we would call patriotic. I believe one become patriotic by their status in America meaning if they have had good life. Lately a lot of the conservative talk show folks would have you believe that because Barak doesn’t wear a flag lapel pin or always puts his hand over his heart when the pledge of allegiance is sung, that he his not patriotic or better yet doesn’t have love for America. I would like to challenge their thinking by saying a lapel pin doesn’t equate to love for America. I also would like to add that I don’t believe you have to be patriotic to lead this country. I believe you have to want the best for the people of the country to lead it. As far as the lapel pin I believe this blog captured it best Politcal Blog

Illusion-(1) the action of deceiving. (2) perception of something objectively existing in such a way as to cause misinterpretation of its actual nature.

Reality- (1) a real event, entity, or state of affairs. (2)the totality of real things and events.

My Illusion:

That because I am educated with a good job, my own house and self sufficient that I wouldn’t have a hard time finding a mate.

My Reality:

That because I am educated with good job, my own house and self sufficient I don’t have a mate and am having a hard time finding one.

I often hear that women don’t know what they want in a man but I have come to believe that men don’t know either. How often do we hear that men want a woman who is smart, hard working, educated and independent, but what they really want is a woman who is needy or who they can sleep with on the first date or a woman who puts up with whatever crap they throw out there. They don’t really want a woman who knows what she wants out of life and is actually working towards having those things. They want a woman that they can be Mr. Superman or in the words of ESG “Captain Save a Hoe” with. How many times have you seen a guy with good credentials (i.e. nice job, car, education) go for the chick who posses none of the same qualities (high school drop out, 2 or more kids)? It just doesn’t add up.

Dating the in this day and time is a struggle. If I meet one more married guy who hasn’t stopped dating or the guy who is living with some chick (there is always some sob story reason why they are “shaking”), I’m going to scream. Am I expecting too much to want a single, educated, guy with a good job and a car who is not married, living with someone or at home with his parents? Is it too much to ask for a guy to bring what I am bringing to the table a stable, educated, good job, own her own home woman. Maybe I am.

One of my favorite rappers was found dead today in a LA hotel. Little details have been released about the death. RIP Pimp C. “Chad Butler”. You will be missed.

Lately there has been a call for a moratorium on taser use here in Houston by local activist and “black leaders” of the community. There reason is there has been an excessive use of the taser on minorities and they want the police department to revamp their policy on the use. While, if you look at the statistics, you will see that there is a disproportionate use of tasers on minorities as opposed to their white counter parts. Also there have been a few deaths resulting from pre-existing ailments that were further aggravated by the taser. But I wonder, what will the alternative be for subduing an irate, uncooperative criminal?

My thoughts are if you don’t :
a). fight with the police
b). Resist arrest
c). Talk crazy or
d). make any sudden moves then there is less likely a chance that you will be tasered.

This is just a thought.

Maybe there is some meat behind the excessive taser use argument but, I think, a taser is better than what the alternative will be and that is a gun.

Recently it has come to my attention that folks I thought knew me well really don’t know me at all. I guess that’s my own fault. Although, I am opinionated at times (some might say most of the time) and bit bossy, I guess I still keep my true inner self guarded. I still keep the walls up. I don’t know why I do this or maybe I do. I guess I consider my self to be strong, independent, self sufficient woman. I figure if I let someone in to the true me then one or maybe all those things I consider myself to be will be compromised. Man do I need some therapy… I read some of the blog entries of some folks on this web and wonder how they could put their inner most thoughts and feelings out there for the world to see? I can’t do it. I am just not an open book. I am more of an “ask.com” type of girl. You ask me and I will answer. They answer I give ill be honest.
So I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that my friends don’t really know me like I thought and want them too.

COMMODITY
NOUN:
pl. com·mod·i·ties
1. Something useful that can be turned to commercial or other advantage: “Left-handed, power-hitting third basemen are a rare commodity in the big leagues” (Steve Guiremand).
2. An article of trade or commerce, especially an agricultural or mining product that can be processed and resold.
3. Advantage; benefit.

So ask anyone what’s a precious commodity to them and you may get answers ranging from diamonds to oil, especially with recent gas prices, to food items. If you ask me it’s Time.

By definition time is not a commodity in the tradition sense but lets look at this more closely. Time can have value; everyday that you or I go to work time is valued by our hourly pay. Time is measurable by the hour, minutes, seconds, and milliseconds, for me and I am sure others there are not enough of these measurements in a single day.
Yeah I know it’s not like a days get shorter but gosh is sure seems that way at times. I know in my like because of circumstances that are beyond my control I only have a few hours of “ME TIME” and I try to optimize those few “ME TIME” hours (more like minutes). Sometimes I am successful other times I am not.

So I know haven’t been updating this blog much and I apologize for this. Hopefully some things will change soon and I will have more time to read blogs and update mine. So check back periodically.

Organized Noise posted yesterday about love and lost started me to thinking about the love ones I have lost. This post is dedicated to my family (so far I have lost no friends) who has passed on.

Uncle Louis Freeman Solomon Sr.
Uncle Fred Ellison Jr.
Aunt Sandra Coats
Cousin Louis Freeman Solomon Jr.
Cousin Jeffrey Coats
Grandfather James Solomon
Grandmother Irma Solomon (Madea)
Grandmother Willie Lynn Coats (Nanny)

Though you are gone you are not forgotten. I miss you all each and everyday.

Illusion-
NOUN:
1.
a. An erroneous perception of reality.
b. An erroneous concept or belief.
2. The condition of being deceived by a false perception or belief.
3. Something, such as a fantastic plan or desire, that causes an erroneous belief or perception.

Reality-
NOUN:
pl. re·al·i·ties
1. The quality or state of being actual or true.
2. One, such as a person, an entity, or an event, that is actual

The Illusion:
That because I am educated with a good job, my own house and self sufficient that I wouldn’t have a hard time finding a mate.

The Reality:
That because I am educated with good job, my own house and self sufficient I don’t have a mate and am having a hard time finding one.

I often hear that women don’t know what they want in a man but I have come to believe that men don’t know either. We often that men want a woman who is smart, hard working, educated and independent, but what they really want is a woman who is needy or who they can’t sleep with on the first date or a woman who puts up with whatever crap they throw out there. They don’t really want a woman who knows what she wants out of life and is actually working towards having those things. They want a woman that they have be Mr. Superman and in the words of ESG “Captain Save a Hoe” with. How many times have you seen a guy with good credentials (i.e. nice job, car, education) go for the chick who posses none of the same qualities (high school drop out, 2 or more kids)? It just doesn’t add up.

Dating the in this day and time is a struggle. If I meet one more married guy who hasn’t stopped dating or the guy who is living with some chick (there is always some sob story reason why they are “shaking”), I’m going scream. Am I expecting too much to want a single, educated, guy with a good job and a car who is not married, living with someone or at home with his parents? Is it too much to ask for a guy to bring what I am bringing to the table a stable, educated, good job, own her own home woman.

So here I am wondering what the hell is going with one of my friends. I’ve been calling her for past 2 weeks or so to no avail, except the occasional response to an email. While I was putting on my worry hat and going through different scenarios in my head as to what could be going on, I realized that I really didn’t know my friend as well as I thought I did.

Let me explain what I mean, some friends you have in your life you know when they need space or you know when they need a shoulder to cry on, or you know that sometimes they just may need your presence, but with this friend I don’t know that. I don’t know if she cuts herself off from the world when she gets sad or depressed. I don’t know when she gets angry or wants to cry if she would like that things or just do it alone. I find that I really don’t know her as well as I thought but that is something I want to change if she will allow it. I consider her to be one of my good best friends and I foresee our friendship lasting, at least I want it to.

I know she’ll say I am getting soft in my old age(she is right) but having gone through a situation with another good friend (see this link), I don’t want that to be us. We’ve often said that if we say or do anything to piss each other off or upset each other that we will let each other know. I know she reads the blog to tell me what’s up girl.

Update:I’ve talk to her since I wrote this post. She is fine just working like a Hebrew slave. So I won’t bug her too much. I’ll let her call me when she gets a moment.